oh just saw the perfect guy for you
oh sorry it was just me walking past a mirror
how you doing?
Dear Mr Vain. Thanks for your email. Perhaps if you had taken your eyes off your own glorious physique for just one moment, you would have noticed that in the background of your profile you appear to have a bunk bed, with a poster of The Rock, a Liverpool FC duvet set and matching wallpaper? You're 33 years old. Either you really need to work on your interior decoration if you ever want a woman to set foot in your boudoir, or, more worryingly, you've photographed yourself topless in some young boys bedroom. No and most definitely no! Yours, concernedly.
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