17 October 2010

From Mr Opiate

Hi there, you fine! I'm a nice guy & looking for a right person for some fun with lots of love & honesty as well joy with Papaver somniferum poppy pods. I wish to hear u soon.

Dear Mr Opiate. Thanks for your email. To be honest, I'm currently going through a lengthy rehab process to kick my raging papaver somniferum poppy habit, and I would worry that if we were to meet, I'd descend back down that all-too-destructive opiate-induced slope. I can't go there again, I just can't, even though you're really rather hot and I fancy you like fury. I'm sorry. Yours, soberly

PS. But if I was to be accidentally spiked, that wouldn't count, right? Email me.

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