hi im mr nice guy from yorkshire i think you look really nice. i like films,music,wildlife,football,games and photography.Im a niceguy and not just after my leg over,im romantic and considerate and im very interested in what you get up to as a scientist.Hope you write back soon.
Dear Mr Nice Guy. Thanks for your email. I'm pleased that your sole purpose for contacting me was not to get your leg over, but you genuinely want to find out about my work as a scientist. I'll tell you about it now. I'm a master when it comes to chemistry, and one area of my expertise is concocting complex chemical compounds in cocktails. In physics terms, I'm very competent when it comes to Newton's various laws, with the exception of after I've been practising my chemistry and I do like to put the laws of gravity to the test. Biologically speaking, I'm very aware of the facts of life, bodily functions and have been known to put both into practise in real life on the odd occasion. In short, I know fuck all about science. Because I work in television. I've always worked in television, and it says so on my profile. So god knows who you thought you were writing to, but it certainly wasn't me! Yours, unscientifically
Desperate times call for desperate measures friends. Gone are the days of meeting your future spouse at a wedding or at work. Oh no. Nowadays, it's either e-dating or no dating. I'm not ashamed to admit to being an internet dating tourist, and one thing that impresses/distresses me more than anything are some of the messages that wheedle their way into my inbox. And some of these are just too good to be left unacknowledged. So here they are, in all their glory. Plus the replies I never sent.
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