05 September 2011

From Mr Upfront

couldnt be arsed to read your profile but could we meet this weekend so u can give me a blowjob please?

Dear Mr Upfront. Thanks for your email. I'm really sorry that my intricate and thoughtful verbosity on my profile has caused such an assault on your senses that you require immediate oral attention to your genital region. I will, of course, be more than willing to oblige by way of an apology for such an inconvenience, so if you would be so kind as to send me your address, I shall be over first thing Saturday morning brushed, flossed and mouthwashed in preparation to make amends with my mouth. I eagerly await your reply with baited breath. Yours, orally.

PS. I am, of course, joking. Fuck off. Fuck right off. I wouldn't suck yours with someone else's. Anyone else's in fact.

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