Internet Berating

Desperate times call for desperate measures friends. Gone are the days of meeting your future spouse at a wedding or at work. Oh no. Nowadays, it's either e-dating or no dating. I'm not ashamed to admit to being an internet dating tourist, and one thing that impresses/distresses me more than anything are some of the messages that wheedle their way into my inbox. And some of these are just too good to be left unacknowledged. So here they are, in all their glory. Plus the replies I never sent.

30 September 2010

From Mr Ghetto

hey there how are you...you look beautiful by the way and oh yeah just so you know i am not a thug lool so don't be afraid to talk...x

Dear Mr Ghetto. Thanks for your email. Of course I don't think that. I mean, why would an 18 year old hood-sporting, street-speaking, bling-bearing, N-Dubz-worshipping, wannabe-Fiddy come across as a thug? Oh, I see. Thanks, but no thanks. Yours, unthuggishly.

PS. Please don't cut me blud. Innit.

Internet Berating

30 September 2010

From Mr Ghetto

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